I remember the day this letter arrived. That night he got out his Junior Carpenter's Set and disappeared into the garden shed. There was a lot of sawing and hammering. Later I heard a familiar tap-tap-tapping, and thinking that he was typing out some more twaddle I went out to interfere. However, he was only tap-dancing in front of a home-made Shrine to St. Vltus, so it was alright. Here's another letter I found: "Dear Mr Lindsay:    I should have thought that the purpose of the Society was obvious. We seek to subvert Fandom through some of its more schizophrenic specimens, such as yourself. You are a soulful, quiet youth, addicted to dreamy waltzes, languorous slow foxtrots and drowsy blues. HAHHH! And the other side? The callous, scheming commercial musician... a purveyor of agitated sound waves in air... with the air re-usable afterwards at no further expense. A pianist of no mean ability... you do not even carry your own instrument around... and use other people's. And for the soulful dreamy agitation of air you collect the hardest currency, and many a skinful of ale. This type of mentality is highly suited to our purpose, and the Dancers need musicians. I hope this makes it plain.    Why am I determined to destroy the RFV&SDS? Silly sort of question, since the answer is so obvious. As you know, fandom is in a poor state; it needs destroying, or the provision of new standards by such as myself or Harry... and I don't want it to be Harry. Further, I love Marion Turner, and Harry is married to Marion. It is in my own interests to do away with Harry, appoint myself Fan of the Century, and work my own will upon fandom to the greater glory of the Romiley Fan Dancing Society... before the RFV&SDS can raise the deplorably low standards of fanhood. Don't ask daft questions in future when the thing is so plain.    Can you lend me some more money?" You don't think they are trying to pull his leg do you? Dear me, what a waste of paper!

Sole © RFV&SDS, 2009.