Oh, for the good old days of the Great Global Warming Swindle, when they told us there would be no more winter snow, we'd be able to spend Xmas day on the beach, like the Aussies, and we'd be able to stick two fingers up at the power companies and their price rises because we'd hardly ever need to switch the central heating on . . .
When is Dave the Leader going to offer Nigella a safe seat in the Commons as his killer political gimmick, we're all asking ourselves!
British overseas aid at work again!
China's Chang'e-3 vehicle soft-landed successfully on the Moon on the second Saturday of the month carrying a rover called Jade Rabbit. The rover is expected to spend the next 3 months exploring the Bay of Rainbows.
Iran, meanwhile, claims to have shot a monkey into space for the second time this year.
Comet of the century just a big flop
Earlier in the year, Comet ISON (C/2012 S1) was being billed as a spectacular post-Xmas event for the northern hemisphere. Sadly, that is not to be. Whilst going round the Sun, the comet was blown to shreds and the Hubble space telescope isn't having much luck in finding what's left of it. So no horizon to horizon band of light into the new year. Bugger!
It's official the NHS is a religion
The latest report on the NHS has concluded that it has become too holy to be criticized. People are no longer daring to point out its deficiencies as they are liable to be stoned to death by an angry mob of Healthites. Years of botched reorganizations, and New Labour's poisonous targets culture, have created a mess of cults and sects, and it is now impossible to say anything about the NHS which doesn't offend one or more of them.
At last, some good news!
Beer is better for you than coffee, according to scientists at Tel Aviv university. Apparently, coffee shortens the protective end caps on a DNA strand (its telomeres), which can lead to bad health and premature death. Drinking beer, in contrast, builds up telomeres and could help a dedicated boozer to live forever!
Yet another good reason to avoid supermarkets
Why do frozen chicken breasts cost 65p/kilo at Asda, Aldi, Iceland and Sainsbury's? Because the meat is imported from Brazil and loaded up with water in a tumble mixer before it goes on sale. 15-18% of the product is just water, which is probably listed in the unreadable list of ingredients. Yet another good reason to go to your friendly neighbourhood butcher than the supermarket for meat products.
We always wonder when we see someone waving his hands about, doing a sign language commentary: "Is he taking the Mickey?" Well, in the case of the guy who did the gestures for Pres. O'Bummer and all the other Greats at Mandelamania, the answer is a resounding yes. He was busking. Nice one!
The people speak!
The informality amid the pomp of the Mandelamania event at the World Cup stadium in South Africa was brought home by the reactions of the home crowd to their corrupt leader. They weren't too embarrassed to boo Pres. Zuma roundly and at length.
Good News: Pres. Hollande of France has won an award.
Bad News (for him): He's been voted the least popular leader in the whole history of France.
The EU Cash Carousel
The European Commission has given £90 MILLION to "green" lobby groups over the last 15 years to help them lobby European Union institutions about their frequently nutty obsessions.
Colorado green deal
On New Year's Day, it will be legal to sell cannabis for recreational purposes in the enlightened state of Colorado.
Living on a knife-edge, and falling off!
Problems with the phone system sounds a whole lot less impressive than an Icelandic volcano blowing off, but that's just what brought air-traffic control in Britain to its knees on the first Saturday of the month. The glitch reduced the number of flights which could use our airspace and led to hundreds of cancellations and long delays. Assurances that it will never happen again should be disregarded as it will be something else next time.
No wonder Dave wants it hidden
The top-secret report on the H2S rail link the one the prime minister and his pals are trying to suppress contains the following severe objections to the scheme:
The management staff are not up to the task of organizing, monitoring and delivering the scheme. In fact they are so inept, it's a wonder they can find their way to work in the morning.
The government is proposing giving the scheme less than half of the parliamentary time needed for proper scrutiny.
The cost benefits claimed by the government don't stand up to close scrutiny and many are fabricated, and the overcrowding on the West Coast Mainline cited by the government doesn't exist.
The construction time target, compared to other major rail projects in the recent past, is totally unrealistic and building the H2S will take at least twice as long.
Romiley escapes "terror weather"
The Great Atlantic Storm, which created the worst tidal surge for 60 years, blacked out large areas of Scotland and closed roads and railways, had no effect on Romiley, BFN is pleased to report. It got a bit windy and there was a spot of rain, but there was nothing which the hardy villagers were unable to take in their stride.
|Morals of the Mob|
The Serious Fraud Office is looking at allegations that the Royal Bank of Scotland drove some fairly substantial retailers out of business; firms like Clinton Cards (put into administration in May 2012), the fashion chain Peacocks (January 2012) and the music retailer HMV (January 2013). This is on top of accusations that RBS drove many small firms into liquidation by engineering a default on a loan in order to buy up their assets at a fraction of their worth.
The "banksters" at RBS were also involved in rigging Libor, the inter-bank lending rate.
Secret "justice" Britain's secret shame
The part of Britain's "justice" system which operates behind closed doors and out of public scrutiny lets social workers kidnap pregnant foreigners, force the unfortunate woman to have a caesarian birth and give the child away for adoption to a British couple. Something else we have to thank New Labour for, as it was legislation passed by the Bliar regime which made it possible.
Bad guys do what bad guys do
Lloyds Bank has been fined £28 million for forcing worthless products on its customers between 2010 and 2012 long after it went bust and needed to be bailed out by the taxpayer and long after it was busted for PPI swindles. The fine was increased by 10% because the bank had ignored a warning about its sales culture delivered 10 years before.
The components of Lloyds Banking Group unloaded 1.1 million dodgy products on around 700,000 unsuspecting customers whilst giving the sales staff huge bonuses or pay cuts to make them meet targets.
The boss of Lloyds Bank, A. Horta-Osorio, received a £2.5 million shares bonus in November 2013 for his work in 2012, when his bank was swindling the customers.
Abuse of white people doesn't count?
A reason why 17 agencies in Rochdale including the police, social services and the CPS failed to stop gangs of Asians grooming and abusing white girls between 2003 and 2012 has been revealed. The cops, social workers, etc., were too afraid of being accused of racialism and being sacked to stop it, even though they knew it was happening. Welcome to the wonderful world of multiculturalism and diversity.
The latest official statistics on what coppers do with their time shows that they spend just 17% of it on crime-related work. The other 83% goes on social work.
Mr. Sneering Clean?
The Balls Monster's latest revelation is that he has never taken drugs of the off-prescription/illegal sort. To which any reasonable person's response is: "Okay, prove it!" Because no one in his right mind could possibly take the unsupported word of such a shifty blighter.
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He's been called the Blogger of the Decade
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So, who's next for a space programme?
Repairing the economy after the Broon/Ballsup disaster will have an unintended consequence. The country will have to waste even more taxpayers' cash on ineffective foreign aid to meet Dave the Leader's dotty target. And wasted the money will be as civil servants will just throw it in any direction possible as they strive to meet their quota for unloading it.
There'll be another along in a minute
The Balls Monster self-destructed when confronted with the Chancellor's Autumn Statement, but no worries for the Looney Left. There was the BBC, waiting in the wings with a big dose of doom and gloom about the sustainability of the recovery from New Labour's financial disaster (to which the Balls Monster contributed heavily).
It was a lot more than another under the Bliar regime
In the 50 years between 1951 and 2001, 2.7 million foreigners were allowed to migrate to Britain. In the 10 years between 2001 and 2011, the total was 2.9 million thanks to New Labour's efforts to rig the electorate in its favour.
The Labour party is getting so desperate for votes that it is now going to "do God" and pursue the Christian vote before it is wiped out by persecution and New Labour's culture of diversity, multiculturalism and putting other religions a long way ahead of Christianity.
There's stupid and there's politics
The Rev. Flowers was made the head of the Co-op Bank despite having no banking or financial industry experience. The Balls Monster actually studied economics before going on to prove that it had gone in one ear and out the other by serving as the No. 1 economic advisor to Gordon Broon during the period when the Broon Monster wrecked both the British pensions industry and the economy. George Osborne, the man charged with clearing up the Broon/Balls mess has a degree in history and no banking or financial industry experience.
What do we conclude from this? Well, as Mr. Osborne seems to have stopped the rot somewhat, maybe picking the Rev. Flowers as a figurehead wasn't such a dumb idea after all.
The question that dare not speak its name?
Wiseguys in the meeja are fond of asking Cameron 'n' Clegg if they've ever taken drugs, but they never ask the same question of Red Ed Milipede. Does that mean they assume he has to be on something to be the way he is?
Strange idea of Customer Service
Marks & Spencer face a boycott of their food halls for letting Moslems refuse to let customers buy alcohol and pork products at check-outs, causing the customers to waste a lot of time waiting for a member of staff who is prepared to do the job he or she is paid for.
Lord Mandelsleaze, multiply fired New Labour ex-minister and best buddy of Tony B. Liar, thinks the Balls Monster was better in government than he is in opposition. But given the total bog-up he made of his jobs both in and out of government, the difference must be microscopic.
Vince Cable does actually have a use he's the government's weather vane. Whatever he sez, it's always a good idea to do the opposite.
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A new excuse . . .
The failure of RBS and Royal Bank of Scotland cash machines and their websites on Cyber Monday was blamed on their own IT failures. Another crash of the websites 4 days later, however, is nothing to do with the banks. They are blaming hackers for a Distributed Denial of Service attack but they have no idea who did it or why. Meanwhile, both banks continue to lose customers who want reliable access to their money at all times.
Definitely the right man for the job
The board of the Co-op Group has chosen a former Labour minister to do a review of how the host of the catastrophic Co-op Bank is run. Lord Myners is the man who nodded through a £550,000/year pension for Fred the Shred after he drove the Royal Bank of Scotland into the dirt. So the Co-op can be sure of getting the answers it wants.
A permanent place is reserved for R. Rogers, the architect who designed Terminal 5 for Heathrow airport and gave it a lighting system with bulbs which are so inaccessible that they cannot be changed when they burn out.
The Balls Monster, who had nothing but red-faced shoutiness to offer in response to the Chancellor's Autumn Statement.
Supermarkets which won't sell alcohol to parents with children in tow.
The BBC's Mandelamaniacs.
Sir I. Kennedy, the overpaid quangocrat who wants to give MPs £74K (a rise of 11%) and who claims that a £70,000 survey, in which 2/3 of the respondents didn't back this huge rise at a time of national austerity, confirms that he has the public's backing.
Deadleg Clegg, who thinks Lord Sugar, 66, is an example of a rich pensioner who gets the free TV licence, which is available only when pensioners reach the grand old age of 75.
Dave the Leader, who thinks it's "mission accomplished" in Afghanistan.
The Bar Standards Board, which delivered one whitewash too many over the case of the 2 barristers on opposite sides of the Lovieson Inquiry having a secret affair.
The BBC for giving supporters of Moslem terrorism a soapbox on Radio 4.
Marks & Sparks and their "gender neutral" toys.
Business Sec. V. Cable (Liberal) who has now joined the New Labour tendency on uncontrolled migration obviously hoping that some new people, who don't know what the Liberals are about, will vote for his vanishing party.
M. Creagh, the shadow transport minister. She thinks Thomas The Tank Engine books should be banned on sexism grounds because there are no female train drivers. How pathetic and typically Labour!
"Far queue, far queue very much!" Frank Zappa.
The Far Queue: the traditional parking place for everything "not wanted on voyage".
|Created for Romiley Anarchists' League by workers in revolt against oppression|
to set the record straight in the 3rd millennium. © RAL, December MM13.